What’s up twenty eight.

I remembered, when I got 25 I was so scared. It is the age that tells you that you are an adult but I did not felt like it. I had this bad feeling, a bitter taste that I had not accomplished what I had wanted. At that time I did not understood that I had all my life to accomplish what I want.
28 sounds totally different. I don’t talk about years between because they passed so fast that it seems like I did a jump from 25 to 28.
Life is different at 27, I understood that my inner self is the most important things I had to discover.
I worked a lot on it and it seems like I finally met my real self, it was about time.
All the insecurities about being me, feels behind me. I was so scared to show myself, that I was constantly judging, controlling who I thought I was, to show my best self to others. But I was completely missing the point. My best self is who I am deep inside. If I am in a constant control I am not free, the light cannot shine.

Now I got it, it’s not about being perfect. Perfection only feeds itslef with fears and doubts. It’s more about feelings, intuitions and being real to myself. It’s about what I want to do, about patience, indulgence, and kindness.

I have learnt that energy is everything and that I am really really aware of it. It can be a place, a person, a moment or a talk, I feel it all.
I no longer let people control my mood. If they are in a shitty mood they will keep it for them, I will not care anymore, anyone right. No one can control my mood except me and I decide if I want to let them in or not.
It took me years to recover from my burn out, to finally find myself again but what a blessing after all. I am so happy that I was patient because I did not just rediscover who I was, I totally embraced who I am.
I know the road is long, I still got a lot of things to work on, but I know it’s gonna be OK.
Being finally centered with myself allows me to be sderene about the future.
I know that anything can happen and I will be able to manage it. Because my entire way of thinking has changed.
Actually, I am no more scared about the future because I am too busy enjoying the present.
I no longer want to say goodbye to my child soul and I cherish it every single day since I have come to realize that it is a blessing that allows me to see life differently.
I am really grateful for the people I left behind, the ones who are still by myself, the ones who inspire me, support me, I am simply happy to cross people’s life because they are my best teachers.
I understood that being strong can rhyme with soft on the opposite. That just a talk can change somebody’s life, that my dreams can’t be taking as a guide anymore and closed doors should not be opened again. I have realized that I was maybe afraid to die and not accomplish what I always have wanted. Since I got married, I started to pray, and be grateful, I am not scared anymore. Because I am no longer that perfectionist who wants that perfect life. I no longer want to be a boss before 30, having kids and blablabla like the society tires to convince us. I am not expecting anything from anyone anymore. I still got my parents, I have a wonderful husband and amazing friends, a roof and food (al hamdullilah) so I am just grateful for every moment and for everything that I already have. This is how I attract good things. (Al hamdullilah) I am even grateful for the times when I am sick because It always teaches me something. I understand that all the moments of life are here to teach us something about ourselves or about life. And I am always so thrilled to discover what it is. I was looking for my path while I was already on it. It‘s like looking for your shoes while you are wearing them. I am really proud of the woman I have became, it may not please everyone but I don’t care because I am true to myself and to everyone. This is all that matters right now. I know that the light will always guide me to a better place even if I had to go through the darkest places. (Inshaa Allah) 
Life is not simple every day but getting older is the best thing that can happen to us.
Today I welcome my 28 with my arms totally open, and I know it’s gonna be something because I am wild, free, grateful, patient, loved and not in control anymore. I know God’s plan gonna be so much better that mine and I let him guide me.
I don’t know what is waiting for me but I am already grateful for the life I have, to be who I am.
So grateful for my family, husband, my friends, the people who cross my road, the travels I am able to make, the lessons that I learn, the fun, the laughs but also the tears and the doubts. I am grateful for every single minute, and I promise that I will make the most of my time since I have realized that life is so much than what we think it is.

Welcome sweet twenty eight, let the best start.

You may also like

Laisser un commentaire

Votre adresse de messagerie ne sera pas publiée. Les champs obligatoires sont indiqués avec *

© 2019 ] SabriBeny – All Rights Reserved.